(Actual unretouched screenshot)
August 13, 2010
Google Voice gives up
Today, I got a wrong number call to my Google Voice number, and the message that was left was entirely in Spanish. So, what transcription does Google Voice give when it can't manage to figure out a single word of your message?
(Actual unretouched screenshot)
(Actual unretouched screenshot)
July 6, 2010
iPad, Part 3
As prophesied in my previous writings on the subject of iPad, my Dad purchased an iPad over the weekend. He's absolutely tickled that he's got a "computer" that's all his and that he can actually use.
He coined an absolutely brilliant term for the device. He calls it his flaptop, originally as a portmanteau of faux + laptop, but also because the Apple case has a little folding flap on it for to cover the screen.
Parenthetical aside: As far as I can tell with a 2 second Google search, he's the first to use that word (at least in this context), so I'm memorializing the event here on the interwebs for all succeeding generations to see.
He coined an absolutely brilliant term for the device. He calls it his flaptop, originally as a portmanteau of faux + laptop, but also because the Apple case has a little folding flap on it for to cover the screen.
Parenthetical aside: As far as I can tell with a 2 second Google search, he's the first to use that word (at least in this context), so I'm memorializing the event here on the interwebs for all succeeding generations to see.
June 23, 2010
We are sorry for inconvinience.
Internet Explorer crashed on my work computer today, displaying the following error message:
(The actual text, for Google purposes: "Internet Explorer raised unhandled exception in third party module and should be closed. We are sorry for inconvinience.")
The lack of articles and the misspelling made me think it's some browser hijack cleverly disguised as an error dialog. However, any anti-virus or anti-malware program I can find to run doesn't throw up any flags. Googling for the specific text doesn't give any hard info, but does show up instances of this message dating back to 2004!
This was in IE 8 on XP today, so either this is in some little-touched section of the IE code that hasn't been updated in forever (less likely), or it's thrown by some library that's used by toolbars or plugins (slightly more likely), or it's actually from XP, and never got updated in any of the 3 1/2 service packs and 45,000 other miscellaneous updates rolled out for that beast (most likely). Either way, text like this isn't supposed to make it out in a release, much less persist through many versions over many years.
(The actual text, for Google purposes: "Internet Explorer raised unhandled exception in third party module and should be closed. We are sorry for inconvinience.")
The lack of articles and the misspelling made me think it's some browser hijack cleverly disguised as an error dialog. However, any anti-virus or anti-malware program I can find to run doesn't throw up any flags. Googling for the specific text doesn't give any hard info, but does show up instances of this message dating back to 2004!
This was in IE 8 on XP today, so either this is in some little-touched section of the IE code that hasn't been updated in forever (less likely), or it's thrown by some library that's used by toolbars or plugins (slightly more likely), or it's actually from XP, and never got updated in any of the 3 1/2 service packs and 45,000 other miscellaneous updates rolled out for that beast (most likely). Either way, text like this isn't supposed to make it out in a release, much less persist through many versions over many years.
May 8, 2010
Happy Mother's Day
Every Mother's Day, our ward, like probably every ward in the US, puts together a little gift/treat thing to pass out to all the mothers (or any woman of apparent child-birthing age). This year, I got tasked with deciding what to do for the mothers and putting it all together. I'm not sure exactly how that happened, and I'm really confused as to why I was chosen for this responsibility.
I'm sort of a non-believer in Mother's Day (and all greeting card holidays for that matter). It's not that I don't think mothers deserve respect. Quite the contrary. Mothers are awesome. I'm just more of the view that every day should be Mother's Day. We should reward mothers every day of the year, and if we're not, one day in May is not enough to make up for it. So, I'm not exactly your first choice to be in charge of the Mother's Day celebrationing.
So, I thought and thought, and got a few ideas, and eventually found some chocolate covered almonds at Costco that were a great deal. I put them together with some Jordan almonds from Target, then Becki and I wrapped little piles of almonds in sheets of cellophane, tying them with ribbon.
Then, to give it a little more of a gospel focus, I thought of printing little quotes on motherhood and tying them to the bags. Michelle had suggested Sister Beck's conference talk this year, and I remember liking that one a lot. So, I went back through it and found the perfect quote for the compulsory Mother's Day treat distribution.
So, remember that old Shel Silverstein poem where if you hate to do the dishes and you drop one on the floor, maybe they won't ask you to do the dishes anymore? Think this might work?
I'm sort of a non-believer in Mother's Day (and all greeting card holidays for that matter). It's not that I don't think mothers deserve respect. Quite the contrary. Mothers are awesome. I'm just more of the view that every day should be Mother's Day. We should reward mothers every day of the year, and if we're not, one day in May is not enough to make up for it. So, I'm not exactly your first choice to be in charge of the Mother's Day celebrationing.
So, I thought and thought, and got a few ideas, and eventually found some chocolate covered almonds at Costco that were a great deal. I put them together with some Jordan almonds from Target, then Becki and I wrapped little piles of almonds in sheets of cellophane, tying them with ribbon.
Then, to give it a little more of a gospel focus, I thought of printing little quotes on motherhood and tying them to the bags. Michelle had suggested Sister Beck's conference talk this year, and I remember liking that one a lot. So, I went back through it and found the perfect quote for the compulsory Mother's Day treat distribution.
So, remember that old Shel Silverstein poem where if you hate to do the dishes and you drop one on the floor, maybe they won't ask you to do the dishes anymore? Think this might work?
February 12, 2010
An Evil Twin?
My beloved wife Becki, during tonight's Winter Olympics Opening Ceremonies:
"I can't decide who I can stand less, but I think I can stand Sarah MacLachlan more than that red haired lady who sings 'Adia'. Who's that lady, again?"
(In the meantime I kept yelling at the TV every time they introduced another musical act that wasn't Rush.)
"I can't decide who I can stand less, but I think I can stand Sarah MacLachlan more than that red haired lady who sings 'Adia'. Who's that lady, again?"
(In the meantime I kept yelling at the TV every time they introduced another musical act that wasn't Rush.)
January 29, 2010
More iPad
This started as a comment in reply to Scott's comment on the last post. I began to ramble on (as is typical for me), and after a while, it just seemed too long for a comment so I put it up here.
People have often asked me, "I'm getting a new computer; what should I buy?" Problem is, the people that really can make use of a computer usually already know what they want. So, the people who are coming to me for advice are people who can't really explain what they even want a computer for or what their needs might be. For most of those people, I flippantly reply "WebTV", "Typewriter", or in some cases, "Etch A Sketch". The only genuine component to my reply is that they should just buy a computer from whomever has the best phone support, meaning whoever's going to take their phone calls when they can't figure out where all these new toolbars came from or why the computer that they over-specced to somehow be "future-proof" is now running so slow. I sure as heck ain't taking those calls.
Whenever anybody like that asks me about a computer again, I will completely absolutely seriously reply "iPad" from now on. 99% of the people in that situation would be best served by an iPad. It's not an issue of something else being more than they need. It's more an issue of something else being a downright hostile user experience for them.
This kind of thing would be perfect for my mother. Or my mother-in-law. Or my sister-in-law who just spent large amounts of money on a laptop but literally only does 2 things with it: MySpace and watching Robert Pattinson movies. Or my aunt. Or my uncle. You get the idea.
I think specifically of my Dad who I don't really trust with a TV remote, let alone a computer. He accidentally erases the contacts on his phone every other week because he can't find the one number that he knows he saved somewhere but accidentally got saved to "SIM Card" instead of "Internal Mem". He got an iPod touch for Christmas and he loves it. More importantly, he uses it. He can figure out how to make it work and how to do things with it. It's downright amazing. He could totally use an iPad and be a web surfing emailing internet using fool.
The more I think of it, the more I think that Apple is not trying to shoehorn a device between the computer and the phone. I really think that they are out to replace the personal computer entirely for a huge segment of the market. And, more power to them. I've long thought that the computer was the wrong tool to choose for millions of people, but there really wasn't another tool that they could choose instead for their particular needs. This is the first real alternate choice there.
People have often asked me, "I'm getting a new computer; what should I buy?" Problem is, the people that really can make use of a computer usually already know what they want. So, the people who are coming to me for advice are people who can't really explain what they even want a computer for or what their needs might be. For most of those people, I flippantly reply "WebTV", "Typewriter", or in some cases, "Etch A Sketch". The only genuine component to my reply is that they should just buy a computer from whomever has the best phone support, meaning whoever's going to take their phone calls when they can't figure out where all these new toolbars came from or why the computer that they over-specced to somehow be "future-proof" is now running so slow. I sure as heck ain't taking those calls.
Whenever anybody like that asks me about a computer again, I will completely absolutely seriously reply "iPad" from now on. 99% of the people in that situation would be best served by an iPad. It's not an issue of something else being more than they need. It's more an issue of something else being a downright hostile user experience for them.
This kind of thing would be perfect for my mother. Or my mother-in-law. Or my sister-in-law who just spent large amounts of money on a laptop but literally only does 2 things with it: MySpace and watching Robert Pattinson movies. Or my aunt. Or my uncle. You get the idea.
I think specifically of my Dad who I don't really trust with a TV remote, let alone a computer. He accidentally erases the contacts on his phone every other week because he can't find the one number that he knows he saved somewhere but accidentally got saved to "SIM Card" instead of "Internal Mem". He got an iPod touch for Christmas and he loves it. More importantly, he uses it. He can figure out how to make it work and how to do things with it. It's downright amazing. He could totally use an iPad and be a web surfing emailing internet using fool.
The more I think of it, the more I think that Apple is not trying to shoehorn a device between the computer and the phone. I really think that they are out to replace the personal computer entirely for a huge segment of the market. And, more power to them. I've long thought that the computer was the wrong tool to choose for millions of people, but there really wasn't another tool that they could choose instead for their particular needs. This is the first real alternate choice there.
January 28, 2010
iPad
A few people have asked what I think of the iPad, so I figure I might as well write it down here. The answer is "I don't know." I'd have to actually have one in my hand to form a real opinion. If it's anything like the iPhone (and it obviously is), then reading about it is a far different experience than actually picking one up and putting your fingers on it. Therefore, it would be foolish for me to really come up with a concrete opinion without some actual hands on time.
That said, I can answer a few more specific questions, like "Do you think you're going to get one?", and "Do you think it will be a hit?"
I'm attempting to be a more provident provider right now, so the answer to any question asking me if I'm going to spend money on anything is a reflexive "no". However, if I had extra money lying around and was debating whether to buy this or something else it might still be a hard purchase to justify.
On paper, it doesn't seem like I'd really need it. I use my iPhone for many things, and my MacBook for everything else. There is almost nothing that I do that couldn't be done by one of those devices yet could be done by an iPad. Still, the iPad could be more useful at some of the things those other devices do, like surfing the internet on the toilet, for example (there's about 1 hour of my week right there).
An iPad would actually be really useful in church (I'm the executive secretary). I've got 2-3 meetings each Sunday, and I have a big padfolio plus my iPhone to manage it all. I'd honestly really rather do everything electronically, but my laptop would be a poor choice for that. It's too bulky, and I can't use it in the hall or in priesthood or anything. An iPad with nothing more than the built in apps, Pages, and the iPhone church apps that I already have would really already be perfect in my church workflow. If someone makes an iPad-specific app that's more useful for what I do at church, even better. I would feel a little self conscious using it for reading in priesthood or something, but there are already 5 guys in the elder's quorum who use their iPod touches or phones for scriptures, so I'd get over that quickly.
I said that there's almost nothing that couldn't be done by one of my other devices that could be done by an iPad. There's one thing I can think of that neither my laptop or phone could do that the iPad would be perfect for: sheet music. I've got a ton of sheet music, yet my collection is puny compared to others (I've got maybe 3 cubic feet worth. I know people who have rooms of their house dedicated). Still, I can never find what I want because there's no rhyme or reason to the way I've got everything thrown in a cupboard. On top of that, half of what I have is photocopies, so without going through each page individually, there's no way of telling what's what. Imagine an app for displaying sheet music that could also catalog and manage scanned music, import the various electronic score formats, give all the expected options for the electronic formats like transposing and audio playback, and couple that app with an online sheet music store with a wide selection. That would be a dream come true for me to be able to sit down at any instrument anywhere and pull up any music I own, or buy/find what I don't. If someone put together the right combination of app and store, I'd be digging through the couch cushions starting today for the money to buy one of these things the second they're available.
Yes, there already exist electronic solutions for this, but they suck. Hard. The MusicPad is $900, is single purpose, and is too big to really carry around idly. The software is also terrible. There's another package that attempts to replicate the MusicPad's functionality for Windows on any Tablet PC. That's a slightly better value, since you can get more use out of a Windows computer, but almost every Tablet PC would still be too big and heavy and poor in battery life. There's the other problem that the program's designed like a Windows program. What works with a mouse and keyboard doesn't work the same with a stylus and certainly not with a finger. That's the big hangup when you try to take an existing solution and just put it in a new context.
What Apple does is different. Rather than use the existing solution, they really rethink the problem instead. They usually do that in such a way that their solution is unrecognizable and unfamiliar. But, if you try what they came up with, you'll often find that they really have come up with a better way. Does that mean I think this thing will be a huge hit? I have no idea. It's hard for me to come up with a list of reasons why anyone would need one, much less me. But, I would not want to bet against Apple on this one. If they're entering a market, you can be sure that they've really done their homework and they have every reason to think that they'll succeed. If they're attempting to create a whole new market, a market that many others have attempted to define and failed, they must really have some reason to believe that they've cracked it, that they've figured out what's been missing from all these other attempts.
If it was any other company, I'd laugh at them and wait for them to fall flat on their face. But, it's Apple, and they've pulled this off twice before with the iPod and iPhone. So, if you don't want one and can't understand why anyone else would want one, that's fine. But don't think that means that no one will buy it, since Apple clearly knows better than you or I about what people want.
(Further evidence that Apple knows what it's doing: the Apple stock I added to my IRA back in 1996 is up over 3800% since I bought it. Sure would have been nice if I had the foresight to buy more than 5 shares, though...)
That said, I can answer a few more specific questions, like "Do you think you're going to get one?", and "Do you think it will be a hit?"
I'm attempting to be a more provident provider right now, so the answer to any question asking me if I'm going to spend money on anything is a reflexive "no". However, if I had extra money lying around and was debating whether to buy this or something else it might still be a hard purchase to justify.
On paper, it doesn't seem like I'd really need it. I use my iPhone for many things, and my MacBook for everything else. There is almost nothing that I do that couldn't be done by one of those devices yet could be done by an iPad. Still, the iPad could be more useful at some of the things those other devices do, like surfing the internet on the toilet, for example (there's about 1 hour of my week right there).
An iPad would actually be really useful in church (I'm the executive secretary). I've got 2-3 meetings each Sunday, and I have a big padfolio plus my iPhone to manage it all. I'd honestly really rather do everything electronically, but my laptop would be a poor choice for that. It's too bulky, and I can't use it in the hall or in priesthood or anything. An iPad with nothing more than the built in apps, Pages, and the iPhone church apps that I already have would really already be perfect in my church workflow. If someone makes an iPad-specific app that's more useful for what I do at church, even better. I would feel a little self conscious using it for reading in priesthood or something, but there are already 5 guys in the elder's quorum who use their iPod touches or phones for scriptures, so I'd get over that quickly.
I said that there's almost nothing that couldn't be done by one of my other devices that could be done by an iPad. There's one thing I can think of that neither my laptop or phone could do that the iPad would be perfect for: sheet music. I've got a ton of sheet music, yet my collection is puny compared to others (I've got maybe 3 cubic feet worth. I know people who have rooms of their house dedicated). Still, I can never find what I want because there's no rhyme or reason to the way I've got everything thrown in a cupboard. On top of that, half of what I have is photocopies, so without going through each page individually, there's no way of telling what's what. Imagine an app for displaying sheet music that could also catalog and manage scanned music, import the various electronic score formats, give all the expected options for the electronic formats like transposing and audio playback, and couple that app with an online sheet music store with a wide selection. That would be a dream come true for me to be able to sit down at any instrument anywhere and pull up any music I own, or buy/find what I don't. If someone put together the right combination of app and store, I'd be digging through the couch cushions starting today for the money to buy one of these things the second they're available.
Yes, there already exist electronic solutions for this, but they suck. Hard. The MusicPad is $900, is single purpose, and is too big to really carry around idly. The software is also terrible. There's another package that attempts to replicate the MusicPad's functionality for Windows on any Tablet PC. That's a slightly better value, since you can get more use out of a Windows computer, but almost every Tablet PC would still be too big and heavy and poor in battery life. There's the other problem that the program's designed like a Windows program. What works with a mouse and keyboard doesn't work the same with a stylus and certainly not with a finger. That's the big hangup when you try to take an existing solution and just put it in a new context.
What Apple does is different. Rather than use the existing solution, they really rethink the problem instead. They usually do that in such a way that their solution is unrecognizable and unfamiliar. But, if you try what they came up with, you'll often find that they really have come up with a better way. Does that mean I think this thing will be a huge hit? I have no idea. It's hard for me to come up with a list of reasons why anyone would need one, much less me. But, I would not want to bet against Apple on this one. If they're entering a market, you can be sure that they've really done their homework and they have every reason to think that they'll succeed. If they're attempting to create a whole new market, a market that many others have attempted to define and failed, they must really have some reason to believe that they've cracked it, that they've figured out what's been missing from all these other attempts.
If it was any other company, I'd laugh at them and wait for them to fall flat on their face. But, it's Apple, and they've pulled this off twice before with the iPod and iPhone. So, if you don't want one and can't understand why anyone else would want one, that's fine. But don't think that means that no one will buy it, since Apple clearly knows better than you or I about what people want.
(Further evidence that Apple knows what it's doing: the Apple stock I added to my IRA back in 1996 is up over 3800% since I bought it. Sure would have been nice if I had the foresight to buy more than 5 shares, though...)
January 18, 2010
November 19, 2009
Blinged-Out Cabbage
Just seconds ago, I got in an order for only my second ever Bag of Crap. There's no possible way it can be as good as last time, but I am still beside myself with excitement.
November 15, 2009
Two Words: Rodrigo y Gabriela
I'd like to now call your attention to Rodrigo y Gabriela, a Mexican flamenco metal duo. I had heard the name mentioned a couple of times, and probably even heard a song or two. But, it totally didn't register with me until I saw a video clip as part of a NPR podcast I keep up with.
I guess if I had heard the songs before, they must not have triggered anything because I assumed they were ten people or something. No. All this is made by two people and two nylon string guitars, and once my brain had visual confirmation of that, it attempted to process that information and then exploded. Seriously, I haven't gone out to buy the CD or anything because I don't think I could take any more than 10 minutes straight without my mind being completely blown. Were they to come to my town to play a concert, I would love to go to see this in person. But, I would most likely go to the show, watch the performance for ten minutes, then excuse myself to the restroom to sob uncontrollably about how pathetic I am and how cruel fate forbids that I could ever possibly hope to do anything this cool ever.
Seriously, watch this clip of "Buster Voodoo" from Craig Ferguson the other night and see if there's any way your pathetic human brain can even hope to withstand the sheer awesomeness. If you're still breathing after that, download the NPR podcast clip and see what that does to you.
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=113641457
I guess if I had heard the songs before, they must not have triggered anything because I assumed they were ten people or something. No. All this is made by two people and two nylon string guitars, and once my brain had visual confirmation of that, it attempted to process that information and then exploded. Seriously, I haven't gone out to buy the CD or anything because I don't think I could take any more than 10 minutes straight without my mind being completely blown. Were they to come to my town to play a concert, I would love to go to see this in person. But, I would most likely go to the show, watch the performance for ten minutes, then excuse myself to the restroom to sob uncontrollably about how pathetic I am and how cruel fate forbids that I could ever possibly hope to do anything this cool ever.
Seriously, watch this clip of "Buster Voodoo" from Craig Ferguson the other night and see if there's any way your pathetic human brain can even hope to withstand the sheer awesomeness. If you're still breathing after that, download the NPR podcast clip and see what that does to you.
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=113641457
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